Tales of a Misguided Mommy

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The most glorious moment in weight loss history ever.

If you've been to a doctor ever in your life you will understand what I'm about to say.  Have ever noticed that when you wake up in the morning and weigh yourself and then go to the doctor you suddenly gain AT LEAST ten pounds?

I hate that shit. I hate it a lot.  Especially because I'm dealing with genetically high cholesterol, and back issues and my doctors just keep saying I need to exercise and lose weight.  Then I go to the doctor talking about how I'm exercising and losing weight and their lying ass sadistic scale ALWAYS says I've gained weight. They doctor always shakes her head at me and talks about my weight, and how I really should start exercising more...blah blah blah she starts to sound like the teacher from Charlie Brown.  I patiently explain that dammit I'm working out 3-4 times a week and my scale at home said something different.  They always shake their head at me and write some secret shit in their file that I'll never get to see.

Today though. Hooooo boy you guys. Today I made that doctors scale my bitch.  I weighed in at home it was 166.  I drove to the doctor and got on the scale and started tinkering with it.  The nurse came over and said, "oh you got it just right" (No shit lady I do these fancy doctors scales often at the gym now).  Then, THEN she said you weigh 166. 

I stepped off the scale and casually put my shoes on and asked if she could tell me what I weighed at my last visit in October.  The nurse looked down and said, "oh 180 pounds."

THAT'S RIGHT MOTHER FUCKERS.  THAT SCALE COULD SUCK MY DICK!

I beat the scale.  Not only that but I had a noticeable change.  14 pounds is a good change.  In the world of doctors scales fourteen pounds is the holy grail of weight loss.

I felt like breaking out into a chorus of We are the champions and playing the Rocky theme song as I walked out.

Small victories people. Small victories.  I finally had concrete doctors evidence and to top it off my blood work came back to show that I'm working out at the level of body builders.  I wear some pretty cute shirts to the gym like these:

But I feel like I'm missing a shirt with a giant middle finger that says "SUCK IT" for the next time I go to that doctors office and she tells me I'm not working out hard enough.  Tell that to the scale sucker!


Love, Misguided Mommy

posted on Jan. 9, 2014

Comments

Jan. 10 2014
beylit said…
Hooray for making that scale your bitch. I always hate weighing in at the doctors office. It always feels like they are judging me even if they say nothing. Though I got a new PCP about a year ago, and he NEVER says anything about my weight. If I have lost weight he comments with a good job, but otherwise he mostly just says to keep up the good work and keep trying. He is the least judgmental doctor ever when it comes to me being fat. I wish I had found him years ago.
Jan. 10 2014
Kristin said…
I hate those stupid scales..they are never happy. First I loose too much weight and they are worried, then I gain too much weight and they are worried. Oh well...I blaim it on the husband being back from deployment, he calls it happy weight. I say well it will be happier when it all fits back in my pant. Yay for your scale. I would like to say it makes me want to start working out...but I kinda just am bitter and think damn you. Just kidding, kinda. Totally happy and excited for the rest of your journey. We are starting a family health challenge at our house. Such Fun :)
Jan. 10 2014
Kristin said…
PS I LOVE your shirt! I want them...but I might get kicked out of the small town Y we have. Maybe I need a running one, or a home Yoga one that says Calm the F down....ha. It's Friday, you posted pictures that you look amazeballs in, and you kicked the scales ass. You rock!
Jan. 10 2014
christy said…
WOW! I am super impressed. And you are so right about the doctor's office scale. I usually always weigh at least 5 pounds more than I did at home. So frustrating!
Jan. 10 2014
Ginger said…
You are amazing! I know how awesome that moment was for you! Honestly I' actually surprised that you didn't start running down the hallway pumping your fist and high fiving everyone.

 

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