Tales of a Misguided Mommy

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Isn't that a Bush song

A few weeks ago at the advice of my general practitioner I made an appointment with a Psychiatrist. My doctor did not feel comfortable giving me a second medication with out the advice of someone who has extensive backgrounds in drugs. 

I began calling around looking for doctors who were on my insurance plan.  Only two were taking new patients so the decision was kind of made for me.  One doctor was over a month out and one could see me in a week.  I made appointments with both.  Then I called my husbands aunt and uncle, who are a psychologist and psychiatrist respectively.  I discussed with both of them what was going on with me.  My aunt laughed when she suddenly discovered why it is I barely eat with the family and why I am always asking for bottled water.    My uncle went over all of the possible medications and then asked me to call him after I had met with the doctor.

The moment I walked in I knew I did not like the place.  I have good intuition, and also I judge medical offices harshly.  They should be clean among other things.  The most highly recommended pediatrician in Reno was immediately stricken from my list as soon as I saw the dust layering his desk and the gross unvaccumed floors.  I practically ran out of there.  So when I walked into this waiting room and saw the rickety office, the uncleanliness I knew it was bad.  The moment the doctor walked out I also knew, she was not the doctor for me.  Her office was cold, uncomfortable with nothing but a large metal desk and 3 waiting room chairs.  She offered me nothing and just jumped right in.  First she explained that she was a resident who only had three more months until she was done, upon that time she would leave and I would be given to a new doctor.  She asked me a lot of questions in an overly professional and rushed manor.  She was impatient, unwelcoming and made me feel uncomfortable.

In the end she classified me as bi-polar with borderline personality disorder.  I am familiar with bi-polar, yet I am clueless on the other one.  After leaving her office I am still just as clueless because she did not offer to explain what the fuck she had just diagnosed me with.  Finally she sent me on my way with a prescription for Lithium.  She started me at 150 until our next appointment THREE WEEKS AWAY and said I would get to 400.

I left pretty confused and unsure of it all.  I was frustrated she wouldn't even listen to my concerns about switching from Zoloft to Wellbutrin.  She went all Alien vs Predator on me when I mentioned my uncle and my general practitioner suggestions informing me in a very stern tone that SHE WAS MY DOCTOR NOW AND SHE HANDLED MY MEDICATION NO ONE ELSE!  

Wow.

I dropped off the prescription and called my uncle.  He said if her diagnosis is correct Lithium is a good drug.  However he said I should only be on 150 for a week and increase weekly up until 600.  Basically having me on 150 for three weeks would be wasting three weeks of recovery and healing.  He also explained further that my symptoms reflect bi-polar level two. 

My final problem is that a large recent contributing factor to my depression is the fact that I can't stop gaining weight.  This is in part to two things; one, I stopped nursing and put on 10 lbs immediately. Two, I'm on two drugs that have high risk of weight gain.  FUCKING AWESOME.  Since Wellbutrin is known to help aid in weight loss and balance out my metabolism my general thought I should take that with a second drug for the OCD. 

At this point I haven't decided what to do.  I will stay on the lithium I think until I meet the next doctor.  I do think I will call my current doctor and tell her I have had no side effects and that I have notice zero changes and request to up my dosage.  I honestly hope I like the next doctor more.  One thing I know is it is VERY important to like your doctors.  I love my Shrink.  He makes me comfortable.  His office is warm and inviting with a big soft couch and a shit load of pillows.  He has bookshelves and a cute chair and a nice desk and most off all no bullshit fluorescent lights that made me feel like I was getting a papsmear instead of a Psych evaluation.  Besides that, he is just a nice guy.  This lady made me afraid to speak and my current shrink makes me unable to shut up.  My hope is that I can find a Psych doctor who I am that comfortable with.  Hell, I'd rather confess all of my sins and crazy to my husbands uncle but he lives to far away.

So.  There is your recent crazy update.  I'll follow up again after I call this doctor in a week to request upping my dose. 


Love, Misguided Mommy

posted on May. 13, 2009

Comments

May. 14 2009
Shawna said…
Shannon I am so glad you posted I was wondering how you are doing but I didn't want to pry. Thank you for the update especially about the meds. I am happy to hear you have a support system in place and are going through all the right avenues. Keep me posted I think of you often. Good luck with the new psychiatrist.
May. 14 2009
Shawna said…
Oh yea I was thinking too, if Zoloft isn't working for you, have you guys thought about switching to something else, like Prozac or Lexapro or just Wellbutrin. You might be able to just take one med that will just work better for you then taking multiple meds. The only reason I am saying this is because when I talked with my OB/GYN about the bad reaction I had to Zoloft he said maybe we would try something else after I have the baby. Like one of the above.
May. 14 2009
The Redheaded Lefty said…
Shannon--- I'm concerned about such a major diagnosis on a first visit. I'm a mental health practitioner and have been in therapy for years. Why was the diagnosis so important? Was it your medical history charts she was working from? She shared that with you and didn't explain what that kind of diagnosis meant? Baffled.
May. 14 2009
The Redheaded Lefty said…
Shannon--- I'm concerned about such a major diagnosis on a first visit. I'm a mental health practitioner and have been in therapy for years. Why was the diagnosis so important? Was it your medical history charts she was working from? She shared that with you and didn't explain what that kind of diagnosis meant? Baffled.
May. 14 2009
Insatiable G said…
Sweetie, I feel for you. Oh how I remember ALL of these feelings after Rawni was born. :-(
May. 14 2009
Megan said…
Hope every day gets a little better for you. You've been there for me and I want you to know I'm here if you need to vent - you know how to reach me on FB! Let me know how you're doing so I don't worry about you.
May. 15 2009
Midwest Mommy said…
Wow, I think we can see why she had immediate openings! I hope the other doctor is better. I am so with you on the appearance of the office reflecting the doctor. Although I hope the appearance of the house isn't a reflection on the mother...I might be screwed, lol
May. 15 2009
midwest Mommy said…
*This is my 5th attempt to comment I don't know why it is not working...some error. Let's try again :-) Wow, I think we can see why she had immediate openings! I hope the other doctor is better. I am so with you on the appearance of the office reflecting the doctor. Although I hope the appearance of the house isn't a reflection on the mother...I might be screwed, lol
May. 15 2009
Mrs. F said…
I hope that the Lithium is making you feel better with each passing day. My mom was diagnosed with bi-polar disorder 5 years ago, and they had to adjust her meds several times before finally getting it right. Hang in there! I hope that you can feel whole again! (Whatever that means, heheee!)
May. 15 2009
Billie said…
((HUGS)) I'm critical of doctors too. Most of them I don't like and we don't have many options here. I actually traveled to Elko for each of the births! I hope that the Lithium will at least help you until you are able to see the other doctor and talk to him/her about what is best. Good luck!
May. 15 2009
Billie said…
((HUGS)) I'm critical of doctors too. Most of them I don't like and we don't have many options here. I actually traveled to Elko for each of the births! I hope that the Lithium will at least help you until you are able to see the other doctor and talk to him/her about what is best. Good luck!
May. 15 2009
The crazy suburban mom said…
Just want to give a shout out for welbutrin... I've been on it for a long time, no side effects. some people have them but not me... but everyone can have a side effect on anything...even food! I don't blame you about the doc, she sounds like a giant doody face to me :) Tracy (got my own food issues )
May. 18 2009
Jessica said…
Bad doc. Sorry. :( I'm bipolar. Severe Bipolar I, have attempted suicide -- the whole bit. I haven't taken Lithium, but it's one of the best drugs out there for Bipolar Disorder. I took Lamictal and I had really good results with it. Not on anything now and it's a rough road. I know you are on Twitter. If you are ever in need of someone to talk to, just #bipolar and I'm sure plenty of us will find you. :)

 

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